What a week.I can barely drag myself to work every day to a job I don't quite hate as much as I did a year ago but still dislike it more than any other job I've ever had. Why am I still working here? Great money and really great benefits. But it has seriously limited my sense of adventure, accomplishment and ability to visit my family in another state. Is this a good trade-off?? Maybe I'll accumulate enough wealth to have a comfortable retirement but what matters to me now?? Is current misery worth a possibly comfy future? What if that future never happens?
Rich has prostate cancer: his prognosis after surgery and radiation: unknown.
Sandy has triple-negative breast cancer: her prognosis: bad, just starting chemo.
Phyllis has advanced liver cancer: her prognosis after chemo and radiation: X months?
"Shocking" news like this makes me ask myself what really matters to me.
All week I've been doing some really serious introspection asking myself over and over: "What would I be doing if I knew I had only two years, one year, 3 months to live? Why aren't I doing it ALREADY? No, really... WHY?!"
Because of this news and other changes in his work life, W and I have been talking about how we could better plan our lives (from this point on) so we could just pick up and go in a few years; travel around the U.S. or S. America or the world. We both have a strong desire to see new places, meet new people and contribute where we can (i.e. Save The World). I interject reality into our conversations like the fact that we'll need to have some sort of income along the way. We agreed that we both have enough diverse skills that we could go anywhere (mostly S. America) and pick up odd jobs. Another reality check is a debt/responsibility assessment: we're thinking we could sell his houses and rent mine through a leasing company, which would provide some money, and then we could keep a home base... at least until we decide we might not want to come back after all. An important question to me: Can we take the cats with us? No way am I surrenderring them to the pound and all my cat-people friends already have their hands full. Do we wait till they die? Or just wait and see? How much debt are we really carrying and could we pay it off while at the same time save enough money to get this ball rolling? So many variables. Can we really do it? Do we really WANT to do it? Why? Why NOT!!!
My brain/body/soul wants to explode.
All week I've been doing some really serious introspection asking myself over and over: "What would I be doing if I knew I had only two years, one year, 3 months to live? Why aren't I doing it ALREADY? No, really... WHY?!"
Because of this news and other changes in his work life, W and I have been talking about how we could better plan our lives (from this point on) so we could just pick up and go in a few years; travel around the U.S. or S. America or the world. We both have a strong desire to see new places, meet new people and contribute where we can (i.e. Save The World). I interject reality into our conversations like the fact that we'll need to have some sort of income along the way. We agreed that we both have enough diverse skills that we could go anywhere (mostly S. America) and pick up odd jobs. Another reality check is a debt/responsibility assessment: we're thinking we could sell his houses and rent mine through a leasing company, which would provide some money, and then we could keep a home base... at least until we decide we might not want to come back after all. An important question to me: Can we take the cats with us? No way am I surrenderring them to the pound and all my cat-people friends already have their hands full. Do we wait till they die? Or just wait and see? How much debt are we really carrying and could we pay it off while at the same time save enough money to get this ball rolling? So many variables. Can we really do it? Do we really WANT to do it? Why? Why NOT!!!
My brain/body/soul wants to explode.
P.S. Picture credit goes to Ken Wronkiewicz - thanks dude.
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